Rough day.  Yesterday went to urgent care certain it must be strep.  The wait was too long, and I’m obviously too impatient to wait for a regular dr. appt, so I left.

Today, better, but still quite bad.  Just yelling.  Let the kids fend for themselves.  Prayed.  Tried to find gratitude even when frustrated.  But yelled.  And then yelled about other things and then about different other things.  Yelling mom is not proud mom.

I’m trying to be kind to myself through a lot of compulsive eating.

I am reading Anne Lamott’s book and the chapter on eating speaks to me very clearly.  I’m not brave enough to let go on it.  I’m just feeling a mess about that compulsion.

Sad and lacking on hope.  Tomorrow will be a new day.  Today I am exhausted and over it.  Tomorrow is a special day for our family- a birthday that we will be celebrating all day with food and treats and more treats…. must be kind to myself and have grace for my own self.  Hard moments in a big picture that is good.  :/

Looking to the light and trusting my God to carry me through the moments when they get too hard.

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