Someone awesomely insightful wrote this.  Two days ago I was FULL of hope and promise for my husband and I.  I felt strong as a couple.  I was standing by my husband giving all that I had, day in and day out.  Waiting with patience and compassion.  Focusing on the positives, the progress, which was vast.  How things change in an afternoon… sad.

Separate from your marriage and relationship with your husband have you ever had a friend who you really liked but knew their behavior could get you in trouble by associating with them?

I had a girlfriend who loved the excitement of stealing from stores yet she had more money than she knew what to do with. She was always in trouble with the police and her parents.

I have had so many friends like this. They were not trying to hurt people but they did by their actions.

This is the problem everyone faces in a society. It does not make them less lovable but it does make them dangerous to associate with and confronts you with questions of morality if you are not comfortable seeing the innocent hurt.

Sex is an awesome force in nature and it is what insures that life will always continue.

I think most people deserve some measure of forgiveness for failing to manage this force of nature that lives inside us.

There is nothing wrong or abnormal for loving your husband because clearly he is lovable but he has a responsibility to protect you from himself by honoring the bonds and commitments of marriage.

It is not just a betrayal of your heart and violation of your trust but the risk to your health and the possibility of bringing other children into the world who will not be provided for in all ways children deserve.

We live in a time that has a very cavalier attitude toward sex which shows a ignorant arrogance of natures power.

I doubt if few people make it through life not being harmed in one way or another by the power of sex.

Nature “as his sexuality” had your husband by the throat but he, as all people who call themselves adults, must take responsibility for their behavior even when we are born into this without choice so the responsibility is pushed on us.

Just as it would be irresponsible to create life that cannot be cared for because of the suffering this will impose on the life that has been created so to each person must manage their sexuality to not bring harm to others or themselves.

We either learn to manage our natures or our natures manage us.

Life is messy and we are imperfect so deserve forgiveness yet within this forgiveness there must be the belief that the harm is recognized and in the words of love the person professes, they will protect us just as we will protect them from the burden that nature imposes on each of us.

Someone incredibly insightful wrote me this, regarding the HOPE and progress and comparative “success” that I felt two days ago.

Your husbands failure to manage himself does not make him necessarily less lovable but it dramatically increases the risk to you in your association with him.

This is what makes love almost impossible without trust because now this love for another becomes dangerous at a time when you had thought that the danger of loving him had passed by the trust that had been earned.

He has emptied the bank account of your trust and replaced it with fear leaving anxiety in its place.

It is natural to love your husband but he has also made it natural for you to hate him by now making it dangerous to love him and by making you feel the pain of questioning your own value as a woman.

He has stolen your trust and damaged your self worth but he is not entirely responsible for this because no one taught him how to manage his sexuality and if anything the culture he lives in has done the opposite.

The culture is turning sex into an addiction for many people just as it is turning food and many other things into addictions.

We live in dangerous times.

Two people in love can overcome just about anything but it will take time for the wounds to heal.

Every individual statement is SO INSIGHTFUL it’s unreal.

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