I have so much to write that I don’t even know what to write!

My Saturday was ridiculous.  Ridiculously awesome.  I feel so glad to be out from under his negativity, his sad, unloving, refuse-to-notice-me, won’t-open-up-to-me co-existance.  I feel so free and beautiful and light.  I do feel sad at times, but it is really only when I think of him, see him, or hear from him.

I got some new ink.
(edited post only to remove photo)

It is perfect.  The experience was perfect.

The feeling is perfect.
That day, the kids days with their dad was perfect.

I’ve hung some new curtains.  With help from husband.  My house is looking beautiful.  It is feeling beautiful.  I went out with S on Saturday night.  It was crazy and fun and fun some more.

I made a friend today at the gym.

I booked a mommy & boys vacation for spring break week, which is right around the corner.  A road trip.

I had sex with my STBX-husband on Sunday, which was AMAZING and so good that it was almost confusing.  We then went to dinner as a family, which was really nice.  But we drove by “the hotel” which was really not nice.

I started playing words with friends with my husband.

I pounded out the elusive 8th pull up in one set and was overjoyed with my body.

All of these things have a big story to go with them.  I will write them some time.

I look outside and see the crazy snow and it is beautiful.  My kids are beautiful.  My tattoo is beautiful.  My hair is beautiful.  My skin is looking old and dreary.  I have aged considerably in the past few months.  My eating has been beautiful.  My friendships are beautiful.  Really everything is beautiful, everything my half dead looking skin and my devestated, sad, broken heart.