I am telling people and it is such a physical relief off of my body to share the burden with people who care about me.
I have to get over the fact that it is humiliating to me and him both, that depending on what I do, people will disrespect me, and the embarassment and stupidity of me not realizing this was happening sooner.

This morning I told a friend who lost a baby just over a year ago. Baby was 2.5 months and died in her crib one holiday night. She brought me back the book that I gave her on grief. In it, was a thank you note for the book and dinner that I took her when she was in the midst of her nightmare. She meant to give it to me so long ago. Along with the thank you card was a card from her baby’s memorial service. I read it and it brought me to my knees. Sobbing with pain throughout my whole being.

There are far worse things than what I am dealing with right now. The perspective is incredible.

She just sent me this:

Been thinking about you all day. How you holding up??? You are gonna be FINE girl. Whatever the outcome is, I promise you not only will you get thru this in one piece, you can take this opportunity to become a stronger, better person.

Every struggle, though seemingly hopeless and dark on the outside, carries with it a golden and rare opportunity to grow in a way most others are not privlidged to experience. It’s all attitude and perspective.

Let this make you, not break you. You will be amazingly reinvented, with or without him, if you approach this with hope, faith, love and a willingness to learn. Neither of you have anything to lose at this point. You are stripped down to the core. It is an exciting time to rebuild and declutter your life of all the negative things you’ve wanted to change anyways.

I say this from experience and am not trying to preach. I just want to inspire you to get through this with your head high. When faced with adversity we have a choice. Be a fighter girl! You ARE a fighter and you WILL be fine. No matter what! You hear me? Now have a glass of wine. Do it. Doctors orders.

Sometimes “acquaintance friends” and “friendly friends” step up and become real friends in the light of personal tragety.

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